4 days in pics.

The room is kinda done, except for the paperwork which is not sorted but neatly stashed away in boxes.

Before:

After:

I can see my table and da carpet. Amazing.

Reading:

Scaringly honest to read abt his walk w God. I realise it is no point gg thru the motions of reading such books, giving yourself a pat on the back for reading good “Christian” books, but you got to stop and reflect and ask yourself what God is trying to teach you thru this. Reading without honest reflection into your own life will not produce learning and most imptly, change.

On loan from TT. Have I been under a rock or something? This book is kick-ass good. Now you really wonder what kinda revealations I was gettin from my NKJV for the past few yrs…………

Listening:

(my sleeping music for tonight)

Been having insomnia and bad dreams- one of which I was teaching in my baggy boxer shorts and apologising profusely to the students- half of didn’t give a hoot and continued talking, half of whom walked out of my class. Then I got lost in the new building, and when I finally found my next class, the story repeats itself.

I hope to wake up early tom and have set 3 separate sounding alarms on my iphone. Once, my alarm rang and I picked up the phone and in a fake chirpy voice (thinkin it was work), “Morning, Khim speaking!” L-o-s-e-r is da word. I am talking too much. This is what happens when I get 4 days alone to myself. Goodnight one and all.

Need.to.clean.

I was reading abt Solomon in Ecc this morning. The man who had everything a man could ask for in this world- wisdom, wealth, status, slaves, herds and flocks, great projects to work on, women to add to his harem…and yet as he reflected back on his life in old age, he was remorseful. Somewhere on his journey in life, God took second place to all that he had and was achieving.

I truly don’t know if it is a blessing or a curse to be so dissatisfied when I try to live life my own way.

It’s got to be a blessing.. by the time I hit scrubbing the toilet.

In a major cleaning frenzy. Half my room is done, and so is the toilet. Next is the paperwork in my room and the rest of the house.

The BIG 3-0.

Ok people, get this right. I am still in my LATE TWENTIES okKkKkk.

Need to S-L-E-E-P.

Ok I need to get to bed. I’ve an impt date tom. At 1630hrs after work, I’m gonna arm-wrestle my guy friend: my right vs his right (which is his non-dominant hand). LG is gonna take bets and video-tape the whole thing.

It’s a win-win situation for me really. If I lose, it’s expected cos I’m a girl. If I win, it’ll be gold and my guy friend’s gonna shed some tears.

Work this yr has made us all abit barmy this way.

Awesome end to wk.

Went to ARIA for dinner.

I’ve not recalled spending so much on a meal before. Had rabbit for entree, followed by venison (medium rare) for main which was def the highlight.

Dessert was abit of a letdown… my friend’s hot choc was REALLY bad. I asked her from a distance if it was, cos it appeared so- the diluted colour gave it away. My strong skim latte was satisfactory. My coffee cake was so-so, so was my friend’s souffle.

The best of the dessert has got to be the petit fours, which I forgot to snap.

Pay-up time. *Gulp*

The company was the best bit abt dinner.

Eventful wk. Besides visiting the most beautiful glass-house on the waters (w an in-built lift?!! in it), attending a bridal tea-party, home visits, lab work… I also  locked myself outta da house and had to DO NOTHING for 3 very long hours on Thurs.

After attempting to remove the flyscreen and open the window, I gave up after hearing some police sirens and went to hide behind the hedge and fell asleep whilst staring at the clouds and waiting for flatmates to return. We’ve since hidden the key in an inconspicuous spot in da garden.

All I wanna do these days is lie in bed, sleep, read…and run in the hot HOT sun.

I can fry an egg on dem’ shoulders.

My kinda humour.

A right kinda angst.

Being the hot-blooded creature I am, it takes awhile for me to get my emotions in check when I disagree w something. I thought after 2 yrs, I’ve finally got my emotions sorted out. I let God chasten me, I watch my attitude, give my best, procrastinate and bitch less and less, be faithful in the small things, did all the work, focused on changing me…

After today’s meeting, I lost the plot.

Some things are just plain wrong. We should NEVER lose sight of the big picture, no matter how tough times are. I find it hard to follow when I don’t agree w what is perceived as the big picture. Angst aside, I’m just plain disappointed.

I need His wisdom more than anything else to walk this out in 2010.

Rust in my tummy for sure..

So… it started off a few months ago w JD putting these 2 cups of water side-by-side to convince me that I’ve to get a new hot water flask/ vacuum/ tumbler or whatever you call it.

(L) from my hot water flask. (R) from the normal kettle.

Of cos..I was thinkin I have no time for this okKkKkkk And seriously my coffee is so dark that you know if I can’t see it surely it’s not gg into my tummy…

Today. I decided to finally throw it out. It pretty bad aye…

Sometimes I’m so dense and stubborn it’s unbelievable…

A wee bit tired.

I think I am burnt out. Totally exhausted these days, sleeping more, but getting less done. The workload is nothing compared to the Sept-Nov period and yet I’m barely coping.

I had a sum of money this yr to spend on a research assistant to help me with the work, and realise I had only spent 10% of the total amt and a yr has gone past since I started on the study…. I am an ABSOLUTE IDIOT, I tell you.

Not taking any time off during the Xmas break but Uni is shutting down anyway. I hope I find my groove back soon before 2010 rolls around.

Lately I’ve been pleading w Him to change my heart abt the research work. I really dunno how to get myself excited and passionate abt physiology studies that I see no relation to the clinical care of my patients. Yet. This is the door of opportunity He has given me and I will run this leg of my race well. Just always helps you know..if your heart is in it too.

Faith like Potatoes.

Watched this movie today w JD and TT.

Rev: “Why don’t you start away? How do you know if there’s anything here?”

Angus B: “No it’s not like maize. Maize- you can see but potatoes- you got to have faith.”

They’re an underground plant. You got to plant and wait for a few months before you see any harvest. Through this waiting period, there is nothing to be seen but you got to have faith that they are growing.

A recent journal entry:

“Surely God is real. Surely what I am doin is on the right path. Surely I heard right. Surely there is a greater purpose than this. Surely it will come to pass.”

One day. I will see my potatoes.